“Hey Harry,” said Hermione excitedly.

“I finally woke up and realized Ron is totally wrong for me. All we do is fight all the time and he’s an immature prick who abandons his friends when things get tough. You and I should be together forever, because we are actually compatible and you’re an awesome human being despite being an abused orphan. Also you’re a badass hero!”

Then she whispered, “You’re also basically the only other age-appropriate guy I know who isn’t a douche, and nobody in this universe ever marries anyone that they didn’t go to high school with.”

“Sweet!” said Harry.